people and things i regret. that's what i want to do tonight.
I told her I would melt her with my mustache. Needless to say, he pants were soon off.
Ive created a fbook group called "threesome" and invited two girls. Im not going to say a word and just see what happens.
I'm doing laundry in pjs and heels, home alone with my margarita bucket.
I was an emotional waste case that night. She made me stroke her ponytail.
She literally just cut half her hair off because she's tired of asking someone to hold it back when shes drunk and puking.
there is nothing more depressing than your birth control alarm going off while you're masturbating, and realizing you've been taking pointless precautions for over a month now.
just won 200$ from the school for "liking" the anti-alcohol seminar. putting it to good use
how?
not even kidding, my fake id is arriving in 6-8 business days
Could have been worst, could have seen me bent over biting her carpet while her son was inside me, i think i would have respnded with "i was just trying to be quiet"
If you don't wanna wax my ass just say so.
He was feeling me up but acting like he was asleep. Like WTF does that mean??
We can only continue to use the "oh what's the difference between circumcised and uncircumcised" for a few more months before people will see through our lies
Give it up bro. I’m not wearing pants or a bra and only an act of god could change that
So the next time I search for "Dragon Dildo" on my phone, I should probably clear the browser before handing my phone to someone and that's the first thing they see haha
its not much but to go through all that to ask for half a balls worth of money was so stressful
Randomize
