Sometimes he's such a bitch I forget that he's not actually a girl. Last night I asked him if I could borrow a tampon.
He had some in his pocket. That was weird.
I'm not saying I want a booty call. I just want what Cory and Topanga had.
She rolled a blunt with one hand...and instantly I had a boner, I'm going to marry this girl.
I just ate a whole bag of celery instead of getting up to get a glass of water. That high.
Have you ever wondered what your stripper song would be?
making an indian outfit so we can be pochohantas and john smith and fuck in the canoe on the night float
He just turned 21, it's very obvious the end of their relationship is near. Now we play the waiting game.
I dont know but I had two different hospital bands and half a pie when i woke up.
I'm trying to ve beat feiesnd sent.
I sincerely hope you find your fuck buddy and have a wonderful night of champagne and whores
Yah... You need to get here. Evan just peed off the karaoke stage.
If you don't turn up on horseback dressed like a highwayman I am not having sex with you today
I AM GONNA CUM EVERYWHERE TONIGHT BRO.
I like to send nudes ok? If that's my biggest flaw I think I'm ok
Turns out, the guy I'm casually fucking has a girlfriend who's cheating on him with my sister's boyfriends brother who I fucked last year. And my sex life has now come full circle.
Randomize
