ok, i just want to know who did it and which end it came out of
you know you go to a catholic school when you are rollin a joint with matthew 14:1-12
Very nice. It looks like a Fisher-Price My First Dildo, but still very nice.
I have dibs on his crisis of faith.
I WISH WE COULD PLAY THE DRINKING GAME TOGETHER AND THEN BANG FOR AMERICA.
We were sitting in a hot tub debating how drunk we could get by osmosis if we kept spilling our drinks in it. This is what engineering college does to you.
I don't know how I'm going to know it's her, I only know what she looks like with a wig on
SHE COULD ALREADY BE HERE AND I WOULDN'T EVEN KNOW
This is classic penis vs brain.
That's why you need to have them together. Katie started crying on the couch and she just gave her a tube of crackers and picked up a beer at the same time. She's like a goddess of making things chill
Your resume just got faxed, I also modified it a bit and sent it to strip clubs...expect weird phone calls...
I have work in an hour and I'm having trouble with concepts such as 'staying upright' and 'staying conscious'. Tie me to your wrist next time we go out drinking,
She invited us over for cocaine and donuts
After she got off the phone with her mom she sprinted down the block screaming "I'M SO GOOD AT BEING A HUMAN!!!!!!!!!!!!!"
And I broke things off with Justin last night. Except I texted him while he was asleep and then I was like well, that's probably not what he wants to wake up to, so I sent him a picture of the coconut I microwaved and caught on fire when I was really high one time.
I'd send you a picture as proof but I want to marry him some day and that would be a deal breaker.
Randomize
