somehow, due in part to drug cocktail and alchl prior to meeting, i blacked out, got home, made total mess of kitchen, broke shower, and made 17 hard boiled eggs
Just saw a policeman use his lights to go through a red light only to turn them off and go to Sonic...
I just saw a woman parallel park a horse. Awesome. Only in New York..
She asked me how I live with myself. I told her one night at a time.
you spent the night getting lap dances from a stripper with a c-section scar then ended up at a one room casino by the airport and you say you're too good to blaze and see pirahna 3d? bullshit
We have video of him nailing the sex doll to my wall and putting all the monopoly pieces in her nose
i miss our vodka / percocet laundry days.
You should know me better than that. I don't whore around. I promise this is a blowjobs only kind of trip.
Just disregard the tooth in the plastic bag in the fridge.
All of a sudden i love everyone. In all their flawed and failing beauty. This is pretty good weed.
We stared down the barrel of pure insanity, took more and the electric elephant god rewarded our fearlessness by giving me golden skulls and naked women crawling out of the walls. I love acid
Don't come. It's not even a party it's a total sausage fest. Like 20 drunk dudes in a bedroom. We can still drink by ourselves though it'll be ok
Like please, take your microdick and try to stick it someplace else. It is not welcome in my world.
I shouldn't be drunk at 3 pm but alas, here we are...
You tried to see how many socks you can stuff in yor mouth and I just put on a damp sock. Is this what bestfriends have come to these days???
Randomize
