everytime he calls himself the maxipad master i can't help but wonder what costume that would involve.
Just so we both are on the same page, I have no solid plans as to where I'll be sleeping tonight.
I'm more concerned as to why he has a playlist entitled Dem Club Beats.
Just witnessed a fat girl fall off the treadmill, pop a medicine ball, and drink coke out of a water bottle all in one workout.
The only reason we got away with streaking last time was cuz we had those miner hats
There's no point in calling it Big Titties Tuesday if girls with big tits don't get anything special
I know you`re my best friend, but when i wake up with this bad of a hangover and no memories of last night, i dont want to see your tits ad my background.
Nope if you can't be there for me emotionally, then my vagina can't be there for you physically. That's my rule.
Pitting the remainder of the bottle against my hangover. I'm expecting an all out cage match for my soul and wellbeing.
Listening to Ke$ha's new single to pump myself up for my STD test.
I asked the full emergency room who else was there because of homecoming and every single person raised their hand
You're the only person not starstruck by him
Yes. That tends to happen after you regularly lick someone's balls.
Not sure when or why this happened but I just stopped giving a shit about everything
If I hear you use the phrase "silky soft scrotum" one more time I swear to God you'll regret it
Is texting an old booty call with "can you still get your ankles behind your ears?" an appropriate way to reemerge into the singles scene???
Randomize
