real busy. everything is packed. thats why we ended up at the strip club
and you tried to get a free burrito from Potbelly's
We're starting "No Hesitation Fridays." The probability of this going horribly are between 100 to 125 percent
Somewhere at this very moment, a group of drunk white girls are singing dont stop believing.
I don't know what happened to get you in this mentality. This time last year your were ass up on a hotel bathroom counter getting licked by a stranger.
I just took my birth control on the way to class with a 1/2 melted jello shot I happened to find in my purse from Friday night. I told you I was going hard this year.
I would not be 19 again if you paid me. Guess who found naked pictures of themselves? Fuck cocaine
I like to keep a steady black out going for the holidays. I feel it makes me less cynical
I hope it's socially acceptable to wear a mesh one piece into last call tonight?
I am the kind of drunk to where i can still drive a golf cart
I was hooking up with this girl last night and she's on top of me with "Flux Pavilion - I can't stop" grinding in the background and I thought "Holy shit I'm going to do a lot of Molly this semester."
Pretty good. They took the stitches out but it still hurts like a bitch. The doctor says I should be off crutches by next week.
Well, that's good. Let's hope drunk you doesn't sabotage you.
He wants Portugal to lose so badly he threw out all the sangria. You know how depressing it is to watch someone dump 4 gallons of heaven?
Car is still out of commission. Looks like it's Grape Nuts and scotch for dinner.
so in other words, they broke and fell off and I ate a gummy life saver off of his balls
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