Hey its my first time.
I think you mean "it's my first time"
My cousin just told me i smelled good. She must like the smell of cum.
whore
Hes warming up week old McDonalds french fries, putting hot sauce on them, and counting them with his shirt off.
My niece just unknowingly cock blocked me. Obviously, someone won't be getting a christmas present this year.
You walked in on me taking a shit and told me to hit the bong
Does the blue bra belong to your sister or cousin?
He is so amazingly handsome. I just wanna fuck every shred of decency out of him.
He could stay over, if you'd just ask.
Yeah. What am I supposed to say? "Oh, my couch is occupied, but my vagina's not"
I just want to be covered in whipped cream and spanked, is that too much to ask?
You went to a drug deal in a onesie.
I cannot lay down. I will throw up my life and your life and the class hamster I had in third grade.
Should I tell him how he got the bruise on his ass or just enjoy his theories?
Liquor has joined the party. Aly just fucking yelled "I LOVE COOKING" and poured margarita mixer, ice and tequila into the blender.
Sometimes being bisexual is a curse. Turns out I banged both of her older twin brothers last summer.
LACE UP YOUR GODDAMN SHOES
N O
Randomize
