The vibrating part of my dildo broke, now I have to rely on gyration.
We should takd a huggy cab to snuggle bunnyville
been sitting in chapter for 25 minutes. drinking last night's franzia out of a XXX vitamin water 10 bottle. recruitment chair has no idea. life is good.
The woman in front of me has a completely clear purse. I can see everything. It's ballsy because her vagisil is on display.
Some asshole just brought BK into my summer class, im already high as hell, i did not need another way to not pay attention
My sister got her picture in the pub crawl section of the paper today and my dad said to me "why can't you be more like her?"
She's making tacos & sangria tonight. I'm sure that's how the pilgrims pregamed.
Trust me at the end of the night there will be queso smothered places you didn't think it could be smothered
That was like a fiery explosion of flailing arms and wonderful passion
Lets now bow our heads and think of girls with ex boyfriends who were great at fingering them. That's so sad.
She licked my face when I was on the phone with a customer and I just laughed. Im not sure if thats good or bad
I'd tell u there's strippers to make you get here faster, but that would be a blatant lie... There's strippers here.
Pretty sure I just got the ok to have a one night stand in Maui...from mom. I'd say that's a win in my book.
I just walked across town, stoned off my ass and barefoot in 35 degree weather for him to bust five mins in and then apologize 13 times as I got dressed.
we should get together and get drunk.
On a Monday?
don't discriminate against mondays.
Randomize
