I don't think ill make it tonight the floor wont let me walk
So we've decided on 'hamburger' as your code for tonight. If you add ketchup or fries, we know the threat level has escalated.
You litterally reached into some girls shirt, pulled out her tit and yelled whats up with this guy.
yeah. pants. i need to put pants on. i didn't do that last night. big mistake
You told me to hold on because you had to barf like a dinosaur.
UD be completely fine. you don't lose control just keep a positive environment. for example i really want to lick the wall cause red is delicious but i don't have to.
You know that hot fire fighter I fucked yesterday? Well him and two other guys are killing the fire on my stove. Awkward.
I don't know what you drank last night but you really enjoyed the 4 egg body shots.
I'll start choreographing the sperm rain dance now
it's like my freshman wet dream come true
I don't know which is worse, the fact that he can say will you fuck me in so many languages or that I'm turned on because of that
someone commented on last weekends photos impressed that so many homeless people wanted to take pictures with us. weird that those "homeless people" are our friends... right?
this is a mass text: the cage has been opened. repeat, the cage has been opened. a search party will be organized. you are all sloppy bitches. that is all.
Finally fucked my buddy's mom!! We are both ten years older and for her it really shows but i hit it!!
When they said they were gonna tattoo each other's gamer tags on their asses, I knew I no longer had a boyfriend.
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