you were making out, puked over his shoulder and insisted everything was okay
Wow, So this kid just walked into class, yak'd on his lab partner then runs out. Class is now cancelled. I gotta find this kid and Thank him.
My bra broke.... so I Macguyvered that shit together with floss
and on the fourth day, god made foam parties.
She danced with a broom while telling me I was "cool as shit" and she "wishes she could take a portion of my big ass and attach it to hers" then she passed out
gona look into getting a tetanus booster and carrying an adrenaline shot...its going off this weekend
Posh spice and Baby spice both in one night. Fantasy complete. God bless halloween.
it is my last wish that my tale be published posthumously as a warning to anyone thinking of eating burger king at nine am
Before I go in, is 'I just got a root canal 2 hours ago' a good excuse to show up drunk to yoga class with a 6 pack? Because if not I think I need to go home.
I'm filtering his penis picture so I can see it better
I spilled wine on my pillowcase and I figure it's basically my lifeblood so I'm just leaving it
Actually we have similar relationship styles aka no relationship... it could work
I was very impressed with his ability to carry on a conversation with his friends sitting in the front seat with his hand in my pants, getting a hand job, stoned, with a cigarette in his mouth. I think he's a keeper.
their motto was "the first one to get arrested wins" so of course today was interesting
I just thought you should know that you should be proud of your dick. It's pretty much perfect. Just, ya know, by the way.
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