last night i used 411 to try and contact britney spears.
dollar well spent
I just saw the pics of me from the costume party as Party Boy. I've effectively cock-blocked myself forever.
Just printed out my Plan B coupon at the library. Saving my own printer ink and paper as well as 10 dollars towards not being knocked up.
My dad just passed me a joint.. this is a turning point in my life.
your stepbrother is rimming his martinis with coke... keeps saying "thank god its tuesday". where does funemployment end and intervention begin?
Just did a line with lance bass. Only in NY
Yeah. I realized I have a weakness for drugs and I need to move somewhere where I don't know how to find them.
Hey, so, you were my "one phone call" last night... Thanks for not picking up. See, this is why I never call you.
No just a slight sexual miscommunication which led to a little (lot) vomiting by one party and a bruised sternum on the other party involved.
I can't even make a guess how that goes.
I love that there are toys on the counter. Coffee, tea, wine bottles, gag ball, and handcuffs.
My kitchen gets me.
My life is literally "I'm too horny you can't leave" or "let's have pie" there's like no inbetween
Can't believe we're making vacation plans with the guy we had a threesome with
I'm only gonna ask u this once. Y is there a picture of u only in superman underwear rubbin ur nipple on facebook????
Uh I can actually explain that one..
Few clarical questions about last night: 1. How did we get home? 2. Am I wearing your underwear? 3. Where is Andrea? 4. Guy with nose ring last night hot?
1. You tried hitch hiking "like a pro" and flashed cars while sticking out your thumb until I called Michael. 2. I don't know but probably. 3. Who is Andrea? 4. Hot.
Drunk me bought a cell phone last week and began texting sober me. The conversation between the two is still on going.
Randomize
