ok, his religious views on facebook are madonna lyrics. we no longer have to wonder about his sexuality.
he acted like he had never seen anyone snort lines of adderall off of a microwave before. freshman.
my mom used to put diet coke in my bottle. i can pretty much handle anything.
i got iced as i was inside of her. i fucking hate my friends
i need to find a notary that isn't going to turn me in for blatantly lying to the us and chilean governments
Its official, drinking for 15 hours counts as a suicide attempt
Wheres my essay?
You mean the vodka drenched shreds of paper taped all over the walls of the hallway?
She said I'm so hungry I could eat a dick and winked at me
We need to drink more. Just think how awesome it would be to wake up in a trailer and NOT remember how wee got here.
My 7 yo sister is trying to talk my mom into buying her a strawberry margarita. Happy Cinco de Mayo.
Give me a minute. I'm trying to buy moonshine from a railroad worker named "Cowboy."
Of course I fucked him. He's a professional beat boxer, his entire job is to do complicated shit with his tongue.
I have no concept of chastity or moderation, she is a Catholic guilt poster child, how could I not try to hit that
I cannot handle Xanax... I just turned my computer on and I googled how to work YouTube
If you binge watch Bill Nye Saves the World without me you can consider yourself single
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