chasing shots of tequilla with sun chips. its doable but not recommended
he was walking around the bar drinking wild turkey and gobbling simultaneously
my vagina's been through so much this weekend
you mean so much has been through your vagina this weekend?
I miss seeing your mom and dad at church, well mostly just your mom... She used to hug my face into her boobs.
We went to red robin and there was a 15 minute wait so we went and fucked in the car. Quickies, endless fries, and a mascot handing out balloons- this is literally the night of my dreams.
I didnt realize til after I got out of her apartment and into the lobby that we lived in the same building.
ill give you the fast version. Hooked up with 17 year old coworker while housestting for my boss
do you think a sharp knife would stab through a cheese suit?
My arms are sore from holding up pukeahontas for so long
My kids are NEVER playing in the park more than 2 feet away from me until they are capable of punching an eagle.
When he opened the car door the whole thing fell off. Even that can be forgiven via his monster cock.
New low reached: a cockroach has actually drowned itself in our dirty dishes. We are heathens. Cleaning dance party tonight. No excuses.
I'm literally spending $165 to fly to Arizona to have a sex road trip coming back
so after 3 days of looking i found the keg...looks like somebody tried burying behind the garage
How did I get up here...did jesus lift me up
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