I cant believe we actually had a nipple party!
he let me wear his jacket and there was a magnum and a bowl in his pocket ... I think im in love
had a guy just try to take his underwear off in the middle of the bar w o taking his pants off. That kind of Sunday afternoon
She told me she was going to ride me so hard i would cum the ghosts of my ancestors...its gonna be a good time
laying naked on couch sucking water through straw. i can still feel the orgasm from last night. thank you mdma.
I'm giving you a get out of sober free card for one of the nights
No one ever gets any after sleeping with her. She is like the broken mirror of hookups, enjoy 7 years of blue ball. Don't say I didn't warn you
If you don't ever hear from me again, just know that I loved you
Jesus Christ that's like a real possibility
Went out with the family last night and some 40 yr old lady wanted to take me home. My mom was not happy with me
Come over. We have half a bottle of jumbo champagne left and no boyfriends to slow us down
Cheyanne in woods. Ducks attacked. My toe is bleeding. We are gpsing our way home on foot. No worries
I'M SO HIGH I FORGOT HOW TO EAT A STRAWBERRY. A FUCKING STRAWBERRY.
whoever decided snowing in 90 percent of campus on a night when the streets are flowing with tequila and skittles was clearly not an R.A.
He picked me up in Smart Car with the license plate “MYWHIP.” I think my ovaries shriveled up and died.
Apparently I told the mayor I want to be a trophy wife
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