Do you ever think God made girls unattractive around their periods as a warning?
she went to pee and i could hear her singing "Drip Drip Drop LIttle April Showers" from Bambi through the door.
So my game is weak??
If your game is "Lets have sex, and maybe pizza" then yes.
found a naked boy completely buried under a pile of her clothes and terrified...she says she was "saving him for later"
I vote intervention dinner around 6, make up movie around 7:30ish, then apology drinks all night. Then hangover waffle house in the morning.
The polish Muslims are throwin paczkis into the crowd and I'm beer 6 before 11 am
Would it be weird if I told you I thought of you when I masturbated?
Looks like I'm more than just your Mexico mistake...
You were so high you insisted on spoon feeding me your KFC bowl while I was driving.
Was who let the dogs out playing?
Ya. You started barking when it ended
Oh my god. I just RAN OVER a child. Oh my god this isnt my day. That kid was cool as fuck though
We were walking home from Pluckers (read carrying your drunk ass) and out of nowhere you yelled "Say bitch you got a Facebook?" at a random chick walking by.
Also, it was so cold in that bathroom that I saw my crap steaming, a first in my life
You ruined a cute cat because your lack of horniness
So if your sore it's because you tried to tackle a tree last night. When I told you at the party, you said "What do you expect, I'm an athlete!"
Can you cover for me after lunch? I’ve never seen a guy who cums as much as my new Side Dick so now I need to clean the house before my husband gets home
Have you actually looked at the corn flakes box? I don't think the rooster has a soul.
Randomize
