TXT her NOW! The phone is actually IN her Va-Jay-Jay!!
I just read the lonely terrorist on nwa had 40 more friends than me on facebook
Defiantly just threw away our yearly bottle collection in front of the campus tour. The school should pay me for recruitment
I smelled my fingers after she left and they smelt like sugar cookies. I want that one again.
She came to college a virgin and left on court order. We ruined her.
Who invented hangovers? And why did I make out with him and eat an entire can of chilli mixed with hot fries while screaming "YOU ONLY GRADUATE ONCE" last night?
No, I know her type. Tall, lanky, uses teeth when giving head, and runs like a giraffe. Don't do it man..
My Grandma made me promise not to drink more beer, so I'm chugging wine.
It's gay softball weekend. Lots of hot gay strangers to go home with.
Ok so I didn't mean for his first impression of me to be lying face down on his roommates bedrooms floor throwing up my jäger but it happened. Atleast my ass looked good in those jeans. Think I still have a shot?
I wish I could take a screenshot of how things literally look from my eyeballs right now
Saw two pregnant women at court today and I SWEAR one of them said "we had a threesome with this random guy and he got both of us pregnant."
There is a reason my most meaningful relationship since 2012 has been with Duracel...
I told him that we shouldn't complicate things. He responded with a dick pic.
So I love answering sex questions in intimate relationships class on a clicker when im sitting next to my cousin..
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