sometimes when you bring the thunder you get lost in the storm
I haven't shaved so I have to behave myself. I'm going to do this from now on.
yeah. and then it was like the room of requirement. the elevator just opened for our threesome.
Home remedy for the herp. Black tea. I need to strap teabags to my wang.
they wouldn't let me take the pitcher of beer on the ferris wheel
You know me. im down for anything that could harm my well being. lets dress like dolphins so everyone will see what dicks they are.
Remember that time I tried to pierce your nipples while high... it's like that, only with more blood... and less nipples
Why is it that every study session with you turns into a hunt for drugs?
I left your tip in your mailbox. Last night was amazing.
Dang. We need a girls trip ASAP. Preferably in a country who has even lower standards than us on a Friday night.
Worse than that. I caught my roommate jerking off to a topless stripper in gta 5.
I'm fine with our borderline lesbian behavior.
I think I pulled a muscle in my tongue.
sorry? thank you? I love you?
Who the fuck stole my fridge again
I'm not fucking any of these fools. But if they want to buy me Olive Garden, that's their business.
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