Is it morally objectionable to repay my debt to society with drug money?
i saved all my weight watcher points for this alcohol
just found more coke in my pocket. i love not washing my jeans after every individual use.
Homeless guy on the metro is drinking beer out of a coke bottle. Hello friend.
Gotta love hanging with Nat. By the time guys realize she isnt going home with them, they've spent enough money and time to think I'm a good idea.
Apparently I joined a band last night. Definitely my favorite blackout.
I'm sorry. I think I have multiple personalities. Or it was the acid. Either way. I'm sorry.
I feel like I just rode a horse, did a million jumping jacks, ran a marathon and need a carton on cigarettes. best sex hands down... EVER
That dude with the beard walked up to me, turned my water into wine with everclear and kool-aid, and walked away. Pretty sure drunk Jesus is back.
My ex's new girlfriends ex boyfriend is getting me my nipples pierced for Valentine's Day so who's the real winner here
Doing a walk of shame at Wal-Mart at 3:30am because when I left at 11pm I was getting milk
ok but bondage is pretty much my easy mode
Quit being awkward towards me every time the group is together. They're going to figure out we're fucking.
This girl in my class is lecturing my professor about zombies. It has been going on for 15 minutes.
Zombies?
Zombies.
How bad is it that I can say that this isn't the first time a married man, who is in the military, has tried to make me his mistress?
Randomize
