i know we're in college but you cant booty call me at 3 in the afternoon. i dont care how drunk you are.
he just told me i make him happier than drugs. that's some serious shit right there
Thank GOD those kids were having a lemonade stand, I didn't have anything to wash down my plan b with.
pre-gaming in the library. just gonna keep going until i'm too drunk to keep working and then i'll be there.
incase your class ends early, there are three naked guys in our room. but don't get too excited, they're all gay.
This is like a relationship, I expect to be mind blown at least once a week.
Josh has a goal of being naked in every RAs room this year. He's already 3/11.
Does Jim keep sending you pics of him in drag too???? If so, are you also slightly uncomfortable?
Mid stroke she told me she'd had bigger. Replied I could tell. Sex ended right at that moment.
She said, after pronouncing how sober she was, and I quote 'Take this bag, it's so heavy it's like 500 degrees! Wait, is it time to go? Can I run? I think I can run!' Then she ran away.
He looks like he was the one that always had koolaid stains around his mouth as a kid, he can fuck off.
I better get weekly incoherent text messages or I will assume something is wrong.
Was make out with a 38 year old lesbian on our bucket list? if it was you can go ahead and cross that one off.
I showered three hours ago and yet feel the need for another one already. This is my day.
ready for a night of bad decisions, horrible moral standards, and an unhealthy amount of illegal substances.
Randomize
