It was still light ouot when we were walking up Pier Ave and she kept asking if she could suck my nipples.
i just dont know how to see an unattractive person as more than a friend
I was asking the bouncer, "if I fall will you catch me?" which then turned into "if I jump off the roof will you catch me?" He said no.
I'll be honest. I knew what I was getting into. I'm not proud, but I'll be damned if I'm ashamed. 6 month draught is over. That's justice.
currently wearing a football players overly sized underwear. discovered a shot count on my leg. I'm a tank hahahhh
It summer and it's getting a lot harder to hide sex bruises from my parents.
First world problems?
Its raining shots and i keep catching them in my mouth like you with dicks shits crazy
yea but i missed the pot and poured the boiling water on my dick. shit hurts. aint nothin easy about that mac
My pubic hair is shaved into the shape of mistletoe.
I hope that's a joke and if not I need a snap of it
He brought over a bottle of tequila and a box of donuts with the Plan B, so I guess you could say things are getting pretty serious.
Like tbh you're not doing anything that screams I'm drunk and yet nothing says I'm going to spend $30 on McDonalds and make out with a stranger like that picture
I think I've had more sex in your bed than you have and I've only been here three days
My liver is going to reject life during Greek Week
How many liver transplants can a person have? Bc you may need a couple
Sorry I fucked your cousin. Again. I just wanted him to take me on his boat.
I wasn’t trying, but work got a lot easier and more fun once he starred flirting with me and looking at my ass
Randomize
