Dear __, it'd be a lot easier to fuck if you ever responded. So I'm throwing in the white towel, since I no longer know what you want. Sincerely, ___
I just got called an ass for saying no thanks to a Greenpeace solicitor. I don't want the whales to die but I do want Greenpeace to fail. Conundrum.
Do u kno any dealers?
I've officially lost all respect for you, dad.
The iPad is going to make my porn collection SO much more glossier... thanks steve jobs.
where'd the toddler underneathe the beer pong table come from?
consequently i now know what mace tastes like
The Swedes wanted a tensome.
Get out here. Doing shots with the delivery guy. Also, the food is here
when we went to bed he asked me to hold his penis so he knew i was there for him
Just warning you now f you do not get intoxicated with me in front of the family on thanksgiving we are not related.
We should start a Help That Bitch Out Fund and split the donations evenly between you two.
I ate you ate to the whole david gray album
I'm so cold without your freakishly high body temperature
that's the equivalent to a normal girlfriends. 'I miss you' btw
Next time I will hook the Xbox before I get high I spent 30minuts thinking I was playing the Simpsons game when it was in reality a tv episode
Anyhow. He gives me orgasms and cuddles and buys me dinner and alcohol. Ill keep him around and cross that other girl bridge when we get there ha ha
Randomize
