I know it's VERY late and i know i may have burdened you, but on the chance that it's sat nite- are you up or willing to be? Christinas camping and i'm chillin alone.
my dad just told me that a lesbian kissed my mom at a bar last year
I hope im prettier
yea, just so you know this whole self-loathing thing is getting pretty fucking annoying
Dude wtf I'm sitting behind some girl in class who is creeping on my facebook page. I don't even know who she is..
You came on your own forehead. Just wanted to remind you that.
You weren't lying about those ceramics students giving the best hand jobs.
THC water in my coffee on the way to work. How's your Tuesday?
When did our fuck buddy relationship, turn into me babysitting his dog?
of course we have a beer bong
how else would we feed our christmas tree
My makeup looks extraordinary for nine tequila shots, running four blocks, falling asleep with my face in the toilet, and doing the walk of shame across campus in the rain. And to think I'm single.
i just stole a 8 pack of olde english 40s and 2 roles of duct tape. we are going to make edward proud tonight.
woke up to a family dragging me under their beach umbrella, they poured water on me bc they "thought I was dead" then fed me quesadillas and nursed me back to health... gotta love Cabo
It kind if looked like a strap-on dressed up for Halloween.
For not being a nurse or a sex worker I have seen an alarming amount of penises.
He just said "I know you want my cock" and I said nah. I want food bro
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