I cheated on you last night. I slept with my laptop.
Yes, it's true. 4 fingers.
come over
yeah sure
wait who is this again? my contacts got deleted...but tell me and ill be there in 10
i wonder what thom yorke's orgasms sound like
deryk tried to steal your screen door and i think sam and brent are duct taping lauren to the diving board.
It's hard to take you serious when you're crying your eyes out wearing an adult sized onesie.
I think we've had way too many heart to hearts in the Mc Donalds parking lot for this to be a healthy relationship
At this point I think you're just judging my taste in men
If I showed up at your door with pizza and a bottle of tequila wearing nothing but chaps and a fireman helmet, would you send me away?
I was in the bathroom and I heard a phone ding inside one of the stalls. I really wanted to say, nature is calling, but I was still in my work uniform
Talk about having your cake and eating it he has basically demolished the whole fucking bakery
I almost forgot to feel shameful, if that answers your question.
I love that you put so much thought and effort into your nudes
I don't send half assed nudes. Go big or go home.
What the hell do you do when your fuck buddy leaves to go for a piss naked and 20 minutes later hasn't come back and can't be found anywhere in the house or outside but has left his phone, tee shirt and shoes in your bedroom.
I don't think there is a pre defined social etiquette for a lost naked fuck buddy now roaming the streets.
My feet surprised me
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