If I had a penis I would totaly hang shit off it. Like stretched out peach rings and fruit rollups.
i got us presents. or arrested. we shall see!
So my boyfriend is on his way over and there is no time to wash the sheets from when I had his roommate over earlier. Put them in the dryer with a damp bounce sheet. Win?
This is a whole new level of slut for you....do they smell ok?
A few things for you to consider: 1. Drunk enough that I'm looking up the dictionary definition of Wish. 2. Dictionary.com has new features. 3. Windows is offering me 500 business cards for 5 bucks. 4. I've always wanted a card that says I'm a ninja
It's a Lindsey's Going to Jail Theme party.
I noticed how good my hair still looked. Apparently rum and coke in it helps it stay curly thru sex. May be using this more often.
It wouldn't have been a big thing. If anything, I woulda apologized to you and cleaned the remote
i think the beer goggles wore off after hearing the story of her 2nd abortion
she's sniffed three people's necks on the bus to see who the good smell was coming from...
she's gonna get diseases
I wanna get shitfaced and yell about Tim tebow
I wish I could remember her name, I mean we fucked and all, but it woulda been nice to tag her in the instagram pics.
Tbh the only thing I was fully concerned about from the dream was what type of fucked up parallel universe doesn't have Coca-Cola
We fucked to Bonnie Tyler in my car. He's the one.
is it fucked up if I wear crotchless panties to thanksgiving to make it easier for me to fuck my cousins friend.
God I love you.
DESTROY DICK DECEMBER\nTHE SUN SHINES ON THE THIRSTY
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