I just pynch a tree in the face
The guy I fucked in the port a poty just called me and asked me on a date!
Awkward!
No he was cute and I said yes!
i think i'm in class. and blacked out.
and by charming I mean he has a horse cock.
so im gonna ask for shark week off tomorrow at work and i advise you do the same
Adams eating in the shower, he says it's one of his favorite places to eat. Btw it's milanos he's eating, he says he loves italy too.
you know by doing this we are using dad as a drug mule right?
Nah the bridesmaids all had dates. I slept with the next best thing: girl who WANTED to be a bridesmaid but didnt make the cut.
Im tired as fuck but i cant leave him here like this i gave him the acid and i feel the responsibillity to put his mind back together its fun im an architect about to about to construct a whole new belief and moral system inside this soul. Talk about the best psychothearpy
Guess who was PASSED OUT ON A BMW. I shit you not
Stop it right now
This time face forward
Shower sex is an art that should not be attemted drunk
Apparently I have decided there are no repercussions for my actions
Also I just took the BEST ass selfie of my adult life.... it's gonna be a good day haha
i black out too much to be "responsible"
I actually talked to his parents last night about it. haha. I had a bottle of smirnoff in my hand, I'm sure they took me serious.
Randomize
