I think she kind of thinks she's better than us now ... please. I go to Michigan.
My scrabble letters just formed failure. Thanks God.
How are you feeling today?
i could've thrown up on command at any point today...
There's a litter of kittens in my bathtub and beer cans everywhere. I want my apartment key back.
he was drinking cheap vodka with warm tap water and a packet of crystal light. if that's not an alcoholic then idk what is
Puked in my laptop case in the middle of my nutrition class.
im probably shirtless right now with a bottle of jack watching horton hears a who. this is a judgement free zone.
I'm using the size of your dick as a guage to see how big something is on Amazon. Any questions?
he actually managed to pick a girl up by telling her that her skirt was ugly and she didnt do a good job with her makeup. thats some seriously low selfesteem
I just laid my head on this pillow and I smelt your penis. It was comforting.
kool aid jammers and 151...our childhood has officially been corrupted.
This wouldn't be the first time my boss has seen me topless
I'm just saying, if you haven't been dropped off at a Wawa at 5:30 in the morning by 3 cop cars, you're missing out
I just want an early 40-something dude who is vaguely unencumbered, professionally driven and wants to put me in a ball gag.
I finished my first whiskey and I'm waiting to have a second one in celebration when your pregnancy test comes back negative
Randomize
