So there are ramen noodles in the shower you need to explain...
finally nailed that neighbor chick. hopefully i can get her wireless password now. free internet trumps moral standards any day
I took my vicodin with tequila. I can FEEL gravity...
i made potato chips in weed oil. what did you do today?
you can't tell me you didn't shit your pants I saw them in the trash can by the bathroom.
you two really need to work out your issues. my vagina can't handle another week of your pent up frustrations.
Lemme guess, I was the one completely shit faced making out with the 50 year old...
LOL, wrong number bro. Good luck trying to figure out what happened though..
Is it related to planting your seed? Cause I don't know if you have studied the development of a tiny human, but that is some complicated shit.
Isn't everything in a man's life somehow related to him planting his seed?
Dude, get out of Andrea's vagina and call me back
If he's gonna send me dick pics; he should at least zoom in to make it look bigger.
We should buy t shirt guns and blow eggs out of them at his house. Bachelorette party
The convent might be a nice break from real life
Oh my fucking god, I was conceived on the first date.
It's been so long since I had sex I might propose to the next girl who will sleep with me.
No. I'm home alone and 100% dickless. I hate my life.
Randomize