Of course he got arrested. He was wearing a toga. Even Tom Hanks couldn't act sober in a toga.
I doubt the Taliban would support fake nipples.
So just to get a feel for things...how prone are you to male Amish strippers...
they pretty much knew i was there to get drunk and fuck their daughter
Just found a partially digested mushroom under my bed. Thanks for that.
he actually managed to pick a girl up by telling her that her skirt was ugly and she didnt do a good job with her makeup. thats some seriously low selfesteem
my self respect just called, its having a good time without me
You weren't just peeing. You were like grinding on it. And you tried to pee in the washing machine first.
The only requirement is that his name is Kevin... All other factors don't matter to drunk me. Drunk me likey Kevins.
Frats are adorable. They make mediocre guys think they're worth a shit.
...the American dream.
I was basically shocked at how calmly you accepted my violently shoving a french fry in your mouth.
The most humiliating part was that I farted while he was tasing me.
We were on a plane, I couldn't just grab his dick
i told someone my fallback plan was to be a slutty bartender and i needed the practice as i straddled them to pour a shot
yeah, I woke up with nacho cheese crusted all over my face and head...a lone jalapeno still stuck in my ear...you win this round drunk nachos....
Randomize
