VAGINAS EVERYWHERE
they're staring at me
i mistaked the back of her knee for her vagina
White boys cant dance....we did an empirical study
i'm pleased to announce i can now open a bottle of wine with my shoe if called upon to do so.
that's not even the weird part though. he already knew where the bathroom was, he might have been here before..
She went home with him because he works at Jimmy John's and his car "smelled like meat"
That is the best grammar in a dirty text ever. Excellent use of the semi-colon. And yes; I am hard.
He doesn't have any game.. I mean, his one move is forwarding chicks pictures of his penis.
I love that your nipples always taste like clean laundry.
I said geronimo as I came I'm not sure if he appreciated the doctor who reference or was just confused
Got head last night. Had the 3D glasses on the whole time.
You know you're hung-over when you're smoking and have the strong urge to eat the cigarette. No more buckets of gin. No. More. Ever.
I feel like vibrating beds are just synonymous with venereal diseases.
Smoked a joint with mom, best Thanksgiving ever!
I would like you to know, a bag of cheese cubes just attacked me at work.
Randomize