How did you manage that?
Told her it wasn't GENITAL herpes... just ORAL herpes... on my penis
lol... jersey girls rock
Do you how many people I've successfully loaded into a Mazda Miata? Six. Six people. How? Strategically.
A friday night jus isn't the same if the cops don't raid my dorm
Just realized I lost my social security card...maybe someone else will do something with my life
Golf group in front of us has 2 hooker caddies. One guy was getting a lap dance as he waited to tee off. Only in vegas.
He kept pouting and saying i cockblocked him and I kept yelling "I'm sorry...but the cock was never out to be blocked"
Trying to find a reliable dealer on Rockfordmugshots.com. Guy arrested for 15 grams of coke could be him !
You realize those people have been ARRESTED recently. right.
Either im tripping real hard, or there's a legit land shark in my apartment.
I may have just made our entire microwave glow green. Like big green. Like spark and make me shit green.
Like worse than the time I blew up the microwave with the egg green.
And then the night went full on bisexual.
One of my favorite March activities is cropdusting people while wearing a kilt.
Just ignore the penis. It's won't bother you. I promise.
He was doing dishes, naked. I dropped to my knees and gave him head. Teamwork level- pro..
Can you send me the picture of me licking the cows udders?
Can I come over?
Sorry I gave up dick for lent. Hit me up on Good Friday tho
Randomize
