Well you know what I always say about freshmen.... If you want it, and they've got it... get it.
so thats when we found her crawling hands and knees up first street singing hold me closer tony danza as loud as she could
did she say where she was going
apparently she thought she was on morton hill and was trying to go back to the bars
I fucked the bump it out of her hair. just had to let everyone know.
she just took adderol and chased it w dog water
Do you think he woke up this morning, looked at you, and then regretted everything?
You love him. Dinosaurs. Math. Sex.
He just dragged himself across the floor on his back claiming to be "the swiffer" help
I did what any insensitive guy would do bought her friends shots and tried to fuck them
I can't drink with the moms anymore. All they talk about is lactating.
I woke up on top of his counter next to a pot of boiling water and an empty package of ramen... what happened to the ramen, we will never know.
You gave your boss a bj to get the safe employee of the month award?
Like if Ohio doesn't think I can get smashed on wine I will gladly prove them wrong
He's perfect in every other way. Is buying him a cockring too forward or just honest?
Like wanna sit on your face while you speak German hot
why did you kick open the doors at church screaming whos ready to party?
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