shes about as inviting as chlamydia
Two girls are now jumping in the ocean naked at 10 PM...and I was just starting to hate Ocean City
she played "i just wanna get married" by jagged edge while we were having sex. why cant i avoid stage 5 clingers
They thought we spoke German and French even though we just kept repeating "I give to you a cat" and "Are you drunk?"
Apparently you need a permit for a flamethrower.
The cops are here to take me to jail, so I guess I have to go with them. If I'm not out by 6 p.m., there is some left-over lasagna in the fridge for you.
also, just kill me. literally hit me with a vehicle, or an aircraft, something that will ultimately make me forget tonight.
k. The important thing is we are going out. You are stones. I am mildly hallucenating.
Like, she can be the shepard of the gays. Delivering him unto homosexuality.
Lmfao a voicemail screaming about you partying with your tits out and a text at 3 am saying you went too crazy... this should be a good one
I think I've forgotten how to blink. Help plz?
First week is awesome. Freshman girls prancing around everywhere like newborn baby deer looking for a dick to jump on
I woke up this morning with my hand on his dick. That sneaky bastard.
i just hope we're both dead or in prison at the same time
Dude, she set my Tinder preference to men, set the radius to 100 miles, and used up all of my right swipes. I think she's mad.
Randomize
