some 7 year old just told me his favorite rapper was eminem and kim got what she deserved...god damn today's youth is in a dark period
Your mom has a birthmark right next to her nipple
Sometimes i look at the biltmore estate and wonder just how small George Vanderbilt's penis was...
she asked if mt Rushmore was natural or man made
No one showed up yet so I smoked 4:20 on chatroulette with a naked chick..
I need to keep friends like you around just in case hell grades on a curve.
She referred to her collection of sex toys as an "arsenal." I'm not sure whether to be scared or excited....
Let me put it this way - if I had a list of things I would like between my legs, she would rank below the cello I turned into firewood sophomore year.
Listening to Whitney Houston sing the National Anthem while I shit before going out tonight. America.
You said "sustain yourself" quietly over and over as you fed joeys hamster cashews. Acid you is a trip
This guy is walking around with a deer head on. Honestly what the fuck
His dick is so big it could be an arm rest.
Went to put my shoe on and asked myself why I left a sock in it. I didn't. Needless to say I found our used condom.
like i got into his car and the beatles were playing. this kid is def getting his dick sucked
you got drunk, told him he looked like shaggy and said 'I wouldn't show you my mystery machine for all the scooby snacks in the world'
Randomize
