If it makes you feel better, you're better at taking it in than ass than she is...
Well...yeah actually, that does make me feel better
Two girls are now jumping in the ocean naked at 10 PM...and I was just starting to hate Ocean City
She fell onto my light and broke all four plants. I don't care how good the blowjob was.
Maybe my heart is located in my vagina
It's only 4 pm and I'm already way past my preferred quota of "could have died" moments
hes the hot one from work who thought i was dead after my party
I feel like I just need to fuck him after all his effort. like a "hey man good try" like those kids who get last place and still get a trophy.
i have at this current moment imbibed enough alcohol to float immerse or otherwise submerge a goat of respectable size. tequila
Fuck your 100 proof Hot Damn. Do you know what 100 proof vomit tastes like? Anger.
I should work for the FBI. Or planned parenthood.
That's quite a broad spectrum. What did you do?
You can't spell "party" without "RA."
You know what else you can't spell it without? "Gonna get fired."
Yeah, I'm just gonna try to repress that and remember him for his big dick and perfect jawline.
He’s 21. The president of his frat. I’m 28 and have a career!
Do it. It’s a noble position.
You seem like the type to go to a craft sale baked out of your mind. I like you.
Oh my god, my vagina is cursed. He's cursed my vagina so that no one but him can maintain a boner around me. I'm sure of it.
Randomize
