Cool, I just put that together. I didn't know if using a tie-died sub machinegun was too crazy
apparently red wine has the total opposite effect that whiskey does on his dick
There is no way he is gay with that hair.
we played lady & the tramp with a hash brown from McDonald's....im in love.
Fuck you. how could you leave me passed out hangin out my truck window when you knew it was starting to rain?
Drunbk and roasting marshmallows on my stove. Accidentally singed the catr's fur but she'sd alright.
Stop making Mac and cheese and sit on his face. FINISH HIM
Apparently I tried my hand at mustard juggling. I wasn't very good.
every time someone would wish me happy birthday I would be like "thanks happy birthday to you too"
My eczema on my back is flaring up so he rubbed coconut oil on it while we were boning down. If that's not a picture of 8 years married I dunno what is.
He was having this drunk emotional breakdown and I was just trying to cheer him up but instead fell and dumped the whole pickle jar on me
It was cool though because he was fine afterwards and somehow I convinced them I did it on purpose...
My hand smells like rave and peanut butter.
I went to BBQ fest on Wednesday and came home wearing a different shirt, so I think I did some good damage.
Where do you think black out memories go?
Into the dark abysmal abyss of the deepest, darkest part of your mind. It's obviously the bodies natural defense to protect you from witnessing the shit you do while actually blacked out.
Nows a good time to tell him. Just be like "yeah, I used to bang her too and it didn't work out for us either". He'll understand.
Randomize
