forecast for tonight- shitshow with a chance of tbell
my version of bright and sunny.
i hope chris hansen doesn't have a boat
Dude we got so high last night. I said "watch this" threw a goldfish cracker in the toilet, and laughed my ass off. We watched the dvd menu for 30 minutes too.
Dude, I swear her tits are going to give me a concusion.
Not sure. All I know is that she has a tight dark green skirt and I will not rest until I have used my teeth to rip it off of her
Being home sucks. I haven't drank in like a week. Or smoked cigs. Or done drugs. Or had sex. My body is shutting down.
Omg. It's like you're one of those deprived kids living in a third world country. We need to save you.
Guess who has two thumbs and just fell outta his car and almost peed himself
I thought he was being really sweet and protective when he pulled me away from the guy i was hooking up with, but turns out he just wanted me to get chicken nuggets with him...
151 hangover. Need apocalypse.
There's a kid in the back of the class drinking out of a flask. Like what is going on?
NOW HE'S DRINKING OUT OF A HANDLE. WHO IS THIS KID?
He asked when the last time I had sex was. I had to look at the clock and respond "12 hours ago"
I just paid a hobo to give me his Santa hat so I can take Christmas nudes. Will send them later, they're fire.
Btw. I have a sinus infection from doing cocaine in a portapotty at a Duran Duran concert. So, gimme a couple of days before y'all start the party.
Just got home, my brothers stoned and he got a high score on COD.. He just asked me if I wanted to have a celebrational yogurt with him. Wtf?
i feel like i got punched in the face....
you did....
Randomize
