the only thing i knew about you is that u dated jordan and were potentially interested in a threesome
Being hungover naked and coloring my hair. I guess I am not naked I have black latex gloves on. Give me a call.
im coming over.
Just spent five minutes taking pictures of my hands for some random guy.
Thanks for reminding me why I talk about you behind your back. Get laid.
We decided I could make bicurious-jitos or ho-meh-jitos or heteroflexible-jitos. But not homojitos.
Blacked out, Had to be carried out of the bar again by two large black bouncers. Asked them to be my "boo thangz" Again.
you reached into a lemon drop to pull out a lemon of someone else's drink..
its like i had a thought but i dont know what the words are for it
Yeah when I texted her last night the only response I got was "stoned eating cobbler."
I can't remember dinner
Hahaha "rub in the ketchup on your face, It'll just look like blush." some gay waiter said that to you, and you go "good idea!"
there may have been a blood oath never to speak of it again...only reason i can think of as to why there was a 1 inch bloody cut on my right boob
Please tell me I didn't send you a dick pic in the middle of Peter Pan..
You ruined a cute cat because your lack of horniness
Why would you trust me with ANYTHING!!!???
OMG. When you threw the used condom on your floor you threw it in my purse!!! I just went to grab my headphones and it was stuck to them!
....even the bartender was embarrassed for her
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