Hungover. Be in at noonish. Turn my monitor on and put a hot cup of coffee on my desk so the boss thinks I'm in
can't wait for January to be Over so I don't have to see all the fat resolutionists working out.
He had a cowboy hat I don't know where from and he was trying to lasso a snowman with a dog leash.
Houston, we have a blender
It's that "make a Pringle and Twinkie sandwich" kind of depression.
It feels like one of my ribs evaporated.
So I just went to 3 different stores because there is no way I can walk out of one store with this many reeses and still have my pride.
I want to put in my resignation as an adult. From now on I will be spending my time drinking beer and skiing.
Just walked in on him banging another girl. He told me " sorry but I'm gonna finish now that I'm caught" ...... I think this is the reason god gave me four older brothers....
Somehow she talked me into getting my dick pierced, weird first date.
Decided to stop by the store on my walk of shame. I must really look like shit, a six year old girl just walked up to me and said "my mommy wanted me to tell you Jesus loves you." Thanks kid.
Your pictures have evolved a lot over the years but I think your angry dick pic phase was one of my favorites
doc says my ankle might be broken, they're going to do xrays. He asked me what happened and I told him if he could find out that would be great.
can we fuck so we can live up to our nicknames for eachother?
Pretty sure he was in my class in like 2nd grade
I like how you know everyone I've ever fellated.
Randomize