Operation extremely regretful is in full effect
Hold on, I'm google imaging "vagina close ups" to see if mine match up
the cops didnt even say happy birthday to me :(
Pls don't use the words alligator, purple, and sperm in the same sentence ever again.
Day two of taking my adderall. I just organized the pantry and alphabetized my dvds. I've missed my mind on drugs
You've slept with me you know how lazy I am in bed.
i looked up and she was looking over the stall watching me pee and told me to unlock the door. that dedicated to sucking my dick.
I may hire someone just to sell my family the drugs they keep asking me for. It's cutting into my doing drugs time.
Everyone here is taking crazy amounts of mescaline and I'm just over here like hey have you tried the pretzel rolls mmm
I feel awful. The bartender added me on Facebook and there's chips all over the bathroom floor
That's probably why white girls drink so much espresso. Piledriving coke and vodka crans takes a fucking toll man
Is it okay to mention my ambition to become a supervillian and kill all humans on a first date, or is that a second date discussion?
You know, this is NOT how I pictured my life would be when I was younger, and yet here we are.
How much weed should I buy my mom for her birthday?
Andddddd I'm drunk
Andddddd it's Tuesday
That's your opinion.
Randomize
