Any toy can be an adult toy. Location, location, location.
so he stopped for a second, looked up at me and said in a really creepy voice, "I can has cheeseburger?" and then went back to eating me out.
Hopefully the semester will be over before she has a breakout. Then I can just avoid the situation entirely
do you know how scary it is to wake up in a CATSCAN machine after a night of drinking?
oh my god its dad's weekend for the sororities i can't wait to throw up in front of all these parents
I think you blew our chances when you yelled "YOU SLUTS COMING TO THE TITTIE BAR?" in their face
Just got 20% off at the liquor store. How you ask? I asked if there was an "I got divorced today" discount.
We are gunna have the best winter break smoking weed and eating ham
Betting for two different teams with two different guys is the best. Time to get $100 by one guy and laid by the other!
Uhmm, it's called hentai.
I DON'T CARE WHAT IT'S CALLED I DON'T WANT TO SEE IT ON MY WORK COMPUTER
I'm crying watching Rihanna at the VMAs. Periods are a bitch
I HAVE TOO MICH DICK TALKING TO ME IDK WHAT TO DO.
Its like my group of friends and I are all dating and we're all just a bunch of Swingers, is that normal?
I just told my bowl "sorry" for putting it down, because I thought I hurt its feelings. omg. I'm high.
I would offer you moral support, but I have questionable morals..
Randomize
