i dont nkow, theres a guy slesping next to me and im wearing 8 tsthirts? wtf happened last night? will you come get me.
i think im in thre room next to you
the nicest thing hes ever said to me is give me head.......please
I dont understand how a fully grown man could convince himself that lime green crocks would look good on him.
A slipped finger up the butt isn't the end of the world
You know who really doesn't like surpise in-your-face air guitar solos? Strangers.
I JUST SAW A SIGN LANGUAGE CATFIGHT
Hm, finding a time when my drinking and your real life don't conflict could be difficult
81 degrees in april.... Thinking margaritacicles, you in?
Just made a jeopardy bj game. Every question has 10-50 seconds on it and if he's right that's how many he gets.
I still think the kiddie pool full of jello option is worth exploring. Just sayin'.
I need vitamin water and Jesus :/
How many hotdogs are you going to eat today?
THE LIMIT DOES NOT EXIST
He passed out before we could have sex. I had no choice but to use his boner to hold my onion rings.
Pregaming at Jodi's. Ten minutes
Thought it was at Brad's?
Pregaming the pregame. Need alcohol before I can see that dick.
My theory is if i keep drinking, evolution will kick in and I will grow a bigger, faster, and more improved liver by January.
Randomize
