Ha. Yes. I'm at a strip club. I'm the barack obama of strip clubs
Your dick is once again the conversation topic.
I'm at an open mic night and the next act is called 'the best creed cover band ever.' The guy i recently hooked up with is on bass.
By getting ready I mean putting baby powder in my hair and possibly changing my pajamas to another pair of pajamas
i can't tell if you're serious or not, but 420 is gonna be pirate themed
I just washed champagne and tuna off my body. I feel like that was a successful shower.
Nothing like a 3am firealarm to kick a booty call out...
I left my coke in the bird nest in the bathroom stall last night but I found it nest and all in my purse I love morning suprises
Ive done some fucked up shit, but last night was the first I have Poured milk on anothers mans face in the shower.
The way I kissed her was actually pretty charming and then it devolved to car sex
This is possibly the most humiliating moment of my life. I have diarrhea, in a port-a-potty, at the Renaissance Festival.
She asked how comfortable I was with her while we were in the shower. She then proceeded to pee in said shower.
And now let us go forth, and be garbage people in public.
Isn't that our default mode?
I wasn't talking about him I meant his penis! Its not a pet
Oh. Well it should be. I like petting it.
Do you realize our room single-handedly hooked up with most of that wedding party last night?
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