Raging hang over. 6AM finish. Shat on a bag of trash in an alley. D L that last bit.
It's pouring out. I am cold, wet, and miserable.... Kind of reminds me of our sleepover last night.
Whore.
I was being facetious
Don't try to hide behind big words.
he had a TATTOO on his FACE. a tattoo on your face basically says "i've gone as far in society as i'd like to."
You were telling me to give my phone mouth to mouth so it wouldn't die.. Should i be worried for you?
why do you have a stuffed bear wearing a thong and a seatbelt in your backseat??
What do I have to do to get you laid? I talked to that girl with the ugly dog for 45 minutes trying to get you in, and all you said was "Steven Spielberg is my favorite director."
Idk, it's Grover wearing a sombrero. Do I need a reason?
He gave up on mugging us when Dave wouldn't stop laughing. He was wiggling his finger at the knife and making baby noises and giggling. The guy just walked away.
You get home ok?
Uh, you stopped by my house at 4 am and woke me up, so yeah.
I'm taking a dab in mourning of how long its been since I smoked with you guys.
School starts Thursday. Don't fling yourself out of the car to throw up screaming "classy" before I park this time.
It's a new year.
God, please protect all woman from micro-penises
I still think it's strange your mom saw me 93% naked with a Santa hat on and a raging boner. Tis the season right?
she broke a 50 dollar bottle of alcohol. then passed out in front of her car and got sprayed by a skunk
Randomize
