Am I a whore if I make out with a boy just so michelle can't?
Two girls I have never met just thumb wrestled to decide who gets to make out with me.
Don't judge me. If you're going to fall off a bed you might as well do it gracefully into a bag full of beer.
It's 4PM and I'm finally awake.. I'm covered in dog fur and shame. I'd say it counts as a good night.
he kept doing his monologue, "if a vagina could talk."
all i wanna do is drink skittled vodka, fuck my gf, and pass out in my neighbors hot tub naked
You need to tell him your pregnant or we need to stop playing doubles beer-pong. My liver is begging you.
Ugh I miss culture and lesbians already
And then after we fucked he wouldn't stop calling me "champ". It was like I had sex with an extremely attractive soccer coach
I was gonna turn him down, but he correctly identified a song from Pocahontas.
My date ended with her leaving the bar with that guy who used to jerk off in the back of the school bus.
I am the oldest one here and I STILL feel like I need an adult. help.
I described my life as a 7 layer cake of death
walk of shame across osu's campus on game day. i can see all the spots i threw up last night. its like my personal yellow brick road.
I woke up and there is a small Irish man playing call of duty in my room. Discuss.
Randomize