Learn some fucking English or leave me alone! "Your" is for something that belongs to you, like 'your herpes'. And "you're" is a contraction for "you are", like "you're not sleeping with me".
I couldn't even finish, she was lounder and more annoying than DJ Khaled
Haha. We better find him. He looked like he came out of Switzerland's vagina, he's that much of a blonde beauty.
She walked in, looked at the bed, sniffed, sighed, and went to grab her cleaning supplies. I'd say she knows.
Let's make a pact to never get in a cab at 3am together unless it's to go home or for pizza.
.....woke up with a tube of cinnamon buns in my pocket, i miss you
There were so few words spoken that I'm not sure if it was make-up or break-up sex.
I wrote my name on his balls in sharpie. In the homosexual world that's like a diamond ring. Shits permanent.
i would have thought, that you two being my best friends, one of you would have atleast tried to catch me before i hit the ground after blacking out.
It was that same situation where "cuddling on the floor" was actually just code for "rough shameful hate sex" hahaha.
Showering in not my own throw up is really hittin the spot right now.
I, soberly, gave myself a concussion trying to take a pic of my vagina. Fuck you and your hangover.
When I was hooking up with this guy last night all I could think about was if we were in Game of Thrones... I need to stop doing drugs
Pretty good. Thinking about getting day drunk and filling out job applications so I don't hate myself as much
we thought it would be safer to lock you in the car alone downtown than take you back home to pass out
Randomize
