I molested 6 butterflies tonight
just walked by a lingerie store, the sign out front, "Specials for Father's Day", in no way is that just not wrong.
this kid just offered me adderall in exchange for my meal points. college at its finest
I don't think you have the libido for two women at the same time
I think you underestimate the amount of time spent masturbating
Wow that was a lesbian tornado.
he screamed PILLOW FIGHT and hit branden in the head with a pillow that had a fifth of vodka in it. then he asked why he wasnt laughing
Just spiked the bong with a ludens cough drop with hopes it soothes my throat after i rip it.
if she didnt wantt to be febrezed, she shouldnt have smelled so desperate.
At this point can I suggest a mail away bride. You judge Nick but you are a strange dude and that may be your ticket.
Singing high school musical songs with an old Russian woman I met on the bus. What are you doing?
Dude. I realize why I got sick. 8 shots three beers in an hour. Plus I ate an expired lunchable earlier.
You blacked out at 9:30 and insisted on sleeping in the hallway after you chugged an entire pitcher of beer. I guess the Jell-O shots were stronger than we thought...
He claimed he was the best ass eater of the south. He was right.
Within the first 2 minutes of this morning, I found out the Lions lost on last play, and Scott Weiland died. I wont be in today.
I just started an apology with "so I'm sorry about throwing the Brita at your head last night..."
Randomize
