You make homosexuality sound like a cult.
Just remembered throwing your phone at your face in a half-drunk stupor the other morning when your alarm went off. Thought I should apologize.
I mean we havent seen each other since december and then bam its cinco de mayo and were having sex under a life guard tower taking tequila shots between each position. no big deal
I told her that I thought she needed an oral mammogram. With me being pre-med she bought it.
If I die I have 2 requests one a viking funeral prye and 2 I want you to take over my facebook and haunt the fuck out of everyone
How external is "for external use only"?
The whole movie was ruined when some chick started laughing with what you could tell was QUITE the mouthful. This of course made the guy laugh harder.
So yeah never trust sex tips from yahoo answers
Well it's official, last night I hooked up with the third girl from the apartment downstairs.
Dude that's a hat trick!
I know, I tossed my hat on the floor as I was walking out.
No lie. I was hooking up with a former football player at UT and mid-hookup I yelled "I'M FRATERNIZING WITH THE ENEMY"
So what are you going to be for halloween?
A woman sitting on her couch watching Hocus Pocus.
It was just a Craigslist hook up but she wore sweats. Where are the girls with class?
Def went to work still drunk... the only comment i got was good to see you drinking more water...
She's too awesome to dump: she gives me great blow jobs and free Popeyes. You just don't burn a bridge like that.
You know, normal sex stuff involves shitting your pants. If you do it right.
Randomize
