Dude. Creed is coming in september.
We're no longer friends.
my phone is just a graveyard for last nights mistakes. at least it's giving me hints as to where i was though, i'm like carmen sandiego
your youtube search consisted of "food slideshow" and "the angry beavers"
Some chick in the back of my Psychologhy of Addictions class just did a line off her hand. She tried to make it look subtle.
My mom seriously just told me my insurance company pays for rehab. In an email. I expect a real, not just us joking, intervention coming on. I'm not accepting a "lunch date" with that bitch.
We have video of him nailing the sex doll to my wall and putting all the monopoly pieces in her nose
Now that I've lowered my makeout age to 21 I have a whole new sea to fish in.
You fell on your face and the waitress just brought you a fresh drink
Were not alcoholics, were just impatient for fridays
We're not in high school anymore. I'm not going to pretend to be impressed as he butchers my favorite songs on his guitar. I just wanted to get laid.
its just been over 12 hours, and i`m dying, don`t know how i`m supposed to survive the holidays sexless
It's simple. He fucks me at his place and I fuck him at my place. It's like man of the house gets to top.
I'm gonna guess ur still high cus last night at like 3am my pillows were morphing into cats and I kept trying to pet them
I'm eating Swedish fish out of my boobs and watching SOA.. There is no way your Tuesday night will be better than mine.
What does it mean when the bartender gives you 4 straws?
Randomize
