She made the grapes disappear! ALL OF THEM!!!
i'm making a list of conversation topics in my blackberry so the ride won't be so awkward
I just ate a whole pineapple for lunch. You should be begging to give me a bj tonight.
I feel like his dick looks like a decorative autumn squash.
Woke up with eyeliner streaked down my face, glitter all over my bed, and holding half-eaten Jimmy Johns. Plus, my whole family's downstairs for Thanksgiving... Welcome to the shitshow that is my early 20s
Please don't smoke the bong in the bathroom while you shit. It is not a shitting bong.
I only see on penis in this picture but I assume there is another lurking out of sight.
I don't think you understand what laundry day means. I am wearing a swimsuit as underwear and my spanish club tshirt from junior high
I think I'd be more bothered by his cross dressing if I wasn't secretly into women..,
Never in a million years thought I would have to put jello shot recipe/equation into an excel spreadsheet
good news: i got laid. bad news: by your boyfriend
I put on a tiger onsie to initiate sex... It worked
Sex and compliments. The way to my heart
I resent the implication of a jizz addiction
I came twice AND he sent me home with edibles. I think he’s a keeper.
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