How drunk are you??
I'm flawless.
Anthony wouldn't know good sex if it sat on his face
is it weird that i feel like i won the break up because my status change got two comments and his got zero?
As weird as that was it was probably the best advice i've ever gotten from a tranny
Never again will we have slut saturday. Never.
What happened to chicks over dicks?
That rule does not apply to 9 inch dicks..
While looking for an apartment, I've realized that the way I rate balconies is on the "how easy would it be to smoke weed here" scale.
What other scale is there?
By the way seagulls wings are very soft. And the lesbian and or by sexual twins say hello. Be home in the little bit time frame.
When a bartender remarks "wow" on how quickly you've finished a drink... Is that good or bad?
i woke up to you and that girl going out onto the balcony naked
oh sorry man.. we went outside because we DIDN'T want to wake you
this st patricks day sucks
ill send jameson via bank tube 150+ miles
Drinking and pointing where stuff needs to go is hard stuff.
I feel like David Hasselhoff when he's drunk eating that cheeseburger and crying. But with cheesecake.
I don't think you understand I turned down McDonalds for you.
I flushed a potato down the toilet so now we have to live in a hotel.
Randomize
